Violence and abuse are in most cases the common habits that some people use to gain control over others. Burgeoning research has shown that 80% of human beings have once in their lifetime encountered relationships with a batterer; a significant other, or a partner. To live with such a person is psychologically exhausting and dangerous as victims end up dead or develop mental disorders.
A profile of the batterer is filled with unpleasant events of the past, and present which have not been resolved for a long time. Some of the psychological reasons given for the behavior are; witnessing abuse as a child, pathological jealousy of others, negative competition, poor socioeconomic status, and low level of education. The usual cycle of abuse begins with tension building; most victims over time learn the first signs and try to avoid conflicts by keeping quiet or avoiding topics of discussion. Surprisingly most batterers have mastered ways to pull their victims to actual violence in any form of abuse such as; psychological, verbal, sexual, and mental. After abusing their victims they become apologetic and give empty promises not to repeat it while they continue abusing them over and over
The effects of violence on an individual are hazardous. They can lead the victims to a state of learned helplessness where they lose their power to control events in their life. Other enduring effects include bruises, low self-esteem, and depression, self-harm, and untimely death.
Today, assault, battering, and domestic violence are taken as crime and attract legal charges which are a fast help for most people. Other than the legal help if you are in a relationship with a batterer that is not your destiny to withstand. You can access professional help to become stable and most possibly walk out of the dysfunctional relationship. In other terms you could be the batterer; this does not habitually mean that you are a bad person. The proper analysis is that you have learned a dysfunctional way to express yourself and relate with others. Professional counseling or therapy can help to; resolve areas of conflict, heal, teach healthy ways to relate with others; this is a better path you can walk through and become a healthy individual.